Chapter 35 Noah dropped from the granite wall with a controlled thud. He'd been bouldering all morning. An attempt to both personally test out another of the park's activities and exhaust his body. Exhausting his body was the only thing that seemed to quiet his mind some days. But hell, even exhaustion didn't always work. Dark thoughts from his past tried to sneak in too often. Things he needed to leave in the past, dead and buried. He shook his chalky hands before lifting the crash pads from the ground and taking them to the new wooden lockbox they'd installed. It made more sense than carrying the equipment through the mountains every time guests wanted to use the cliff edge for bouldering or rock climbing. Once everything was packed up, he checked the time on his phone. Ten a.m. Addie would be here and working. They could go over the booking system. Or at least, she could dumb it down enough so he understood the basics. He had no damn clue with that stuff, and Colt wasn't much better. The woman was making herself irreplaceable around here. He set off on a jog through the forest. Since he was a kid, every time the world got loud, he got moving. Although, back then, he didn't have much to worry about. Now? Now there were days when he practically had to destroy his body just to get two seconds of peace. He shook his head. He needed to stop thinking about it. He'd gotten therapy. He was out. That should be enough. When he neared the office, he slowed to a walk and took out his phone. He hit his youngest sister's number. Three rings before Bonnie answered. "Noah. Hi." Every time he heard her voice, she sounded more relaxed. More willing to talk to him and like the little sister he remembered. "Hey, Bonnie. How are you doing today?" "I'm good. Just...keeping busy at work." He frowned. There was hesitation in her voice. "What's wrong?" "Nothing." "Not nothing. There's something. I can hear it in your voice." There was a short pause. "I'm just worried. They've cut funding at the shelter, and I'm afraid my job will be axed." "Shit." "Yeah, shit." "Well, you know, there are plenty of jobs here in Amber Ridge." At least, he was pretty sure there were. He had no idea about jobs at any shelters though. Surely there was a local women's shelter, but whether they had any openings, he didn't know. There was a heavy pause. Fuck, too soon. He quickly changed the subject, telling her a dumb story about a fall he'd had on the bouldering wall. Of course he embellished it. It was worth it to hear her laugh. When he finally got off the phone, he was smiling. Bonnie was family, and he wanted her home. But it would take time. She blamed herself for the passing of her boyfriend. And hell, the guy's parents had blamed her too. Which was bullshit. He just hoped she also wasn't shouldering any of the blame for their parents' deaths. It was a car accident, but they'd been on their way to pick her up. It hadn't been anyone's fault. He stepped inside the office. "No, Bernie, you promised me today, so it needs to be today." At the sound of Addie's firm voice, a smile tugged at Noah's lips. She sat at the reception desk, phone against her ear. In the small space of time he'd had to get to know her, he'd learned one thing...she was a ball buster. She knew what she wanted, and she went after it. "I need the power connected before she parks her food truck. You told me it would happen today, so I told her to come on Monday." Noah moved around the desk, snatching one of her M&M's from beside the computer. She whacked his hand, but there was a hint of a grin on her face. "No, Bernie, that won't work because I don't believe you anymore. If I agree to let you come Monday morning, and you cancel, it doesn't give me time to replace you before she comes later that day. Then I'm a sucker and I'm screwed, and I don't like being either of those things. So you have one hour to either come and do the job you told me you'd do or transfer the deposit back and I will take my business elsewhere-and I mean all future business for the park." There was a small pause before Addie smiled. "I'll see you soon, Bernie." Noah blew out a long breath. "Remind me never to mess with you." "That's the third time he's tried to reschedule after he demanded a deposit on the initial booking. Tell me again why you asked me to use him?" Noah lifted a shoulder. "I like him?" "Is this another Burt's Pizza thing?" "What can I say? We're nice people here in Amber Ridge." She scoffed. "Either that or you have this bizarre need to keep people who are terrible at their jobs in business." "Hm...definitely the first." She chuckled, and the sound hit him right in the chest like a freight train. He pushed it down. Just like he pushed down what her scent did to him. The fresh nature-like smell that reminded him of the rain in the mountains. He ignored it all. He was her employer. He was also thirteen years older, which wasn't a lot for some people, but to him, it felt huge. She frowned at him. "What's with the frown, Marine?" "Marine?" She lifted a shoulder as she turned back to the computer screen. "My dad was a Marine. I think the nickname's fitting." "He was?" "Yep. A retired gunny. Still shines his boots every Sunday like he's got inspection Monday morning." Noah chuckled. "Old habits die hard." "Your habits wouldn't be old though. You only just got out." She turned and looked at him. Closer than anyone else had looked at him since getting home. "How are you doing since being out?" Shit. Why did her question make him want to flinch? Because her gaze was so intense? Or because if he answered that honestly, he'd be telling her something that he tried not to think about? "Why?" "Well, my dad still has PTSD from a lot that happened. Mom has to wake him from these loud, explosive nightmares sometimes." She shivered. "It's awful. I'm not saying you have PTSD or anything, just that I know you have to go through a lot as a Marine. And fitting back into civilian life afterward can be very hard." It wasn't just hard. Some days it felt impossible. "I'm doing great." A damn lie. There were moments when he felt fine. And moments when he couldn't breathe. The memories tried to push to the surface, and his heart rate jumped up. Not now. Her brows rose, like she saw right through the lie. "Okay. But if that changes, I'm a great listener." "Thanks, Addison." She gave him a small smile. "Now, I have a couple forms for you to sign." She rose and stepped around him toward the printer. He was still breathing too quickly. What the hell was wrong with him? He closed his eyes-but realized his mistake immediately when he saw those fucking chains. A shoulder bumped his. The chains around his wrists were like steel. Still, he fought them. He didn't even feel the ache of his bloody wrists anymore. The sharp pain from his broken ribs. All he could focus on was Boone. His teammate was fighting too, but instead of chains, he was fighting men. Men who'd captured them. Tortured them. The fucking scum of the earth. A hand suddenly touched his shoulder, and the chains disappeared as he flung the asshole to the floor and wrapped his fingers around his neck. Noah blinked. Addie. She was beneath him on the floor, eyes wide, no color in her face. But it was his fingers that he couldn't look away from. They circled her neck. Too tight. Too fucking tight. He yanked his hands away like her skin burned him. He wanted to ask how she'd gotten there, how they'd both gotten to this position, but he already knew. And the reality made acid churn in his gut. "Did I hurt you?" Disgust coated each word. Disgust in himself. That he'd touched a woman like that. Scared her like that. She opened and closed her mouth. "I'm okay." Barely a whisper. "Are you?" No. He was far from okay. He shot to his feet. He wanted to help her up too, but she was already pushing to her feet and stepping away. Why the hell would she want him to touch her anyway? She wouldn't. She probably wanted to be as far from him as possible. "I'm sorry." Sorry? He was fucking sorry? That wasn't enough. He'd just assaulted her. He could almost see his fucking fingerprints on her neck. "It's okay," she whispered. "You didn't mean to." His brows drew together. Did she know that because of her dad? Did he have flashbacks like that? "Do you want to press charges?" He wouldn't blame her. Hell, he'd welcome it. It was what he deserved. Her brows rose. "Charges?" "I assaulted you, Addison. I can call Jesse-" "No. I'm all right. Really. It's you I'm worried about." He didn't respond. He just stood there feeling like he was suspended in time. Like if he moved or spoke it would make the last five minutes real. She stepped toward him, but he rushed around the desk. "I should go." "Wait!" He stopped mid-turn, when really all he wanted to do was run. Get the hell out. Scared that he'd lose his fucking mind a second time. "It's really okay," she pushed. "I'm okay." Did she repeat those words because she knew he hadn't believed her the first time? Air. He needed fresh fucking air and a million miles between him and anyone else-especially her. "I'll see you tomorrow, Addison." He turned and walked outside, the same question repeating in his head over and over again. What the fuck just happened? He'd never hurt a woman in his life. One thing he was certain of...he never wanted that to happen again. Which meant he needed to stay the hell away from Addison.