Chapter 24 It was hard to look at her. Primrose had only gotten more beautiful over the years. Even harder than that, though, was knowing in my soul that she still had feelings for me. Knowing that if she didn't believe her daughter bound her to Casey, we might've stood a chance. But that wasn't reality. That sweet little girl did deserve a happy home, one with both of her parents. At the same time, Primrose deserved to live her happiest life. It seemed like an insoluble conundrum, the only certainty being that someone would get hurt. The fire lit up her beautiful eyes. Neither blue, nor green. Aquamarine. I could see the flames from the fire reflected in them. Looking over at my phone, I realized we didn't have much time left. "When is the wedding?" I asked. "Six months." I nodded, relieved that it wasn't any sooner, and yet stressed that I only had six months to correct five years' worth of damage that I'd caused. I thought about how beautiful she'd look walking down the aisle, about their daughter scattering rose petals. Rosebud petals. My Rosebud-who wasn't mine anymore. I also thought about the ring I'd bought, the one I'd tucked away in the family safe five years ago while I figured out the right time to give it to her. That had been just a couple of weeks before everything went to hell. I'd likely never get the chance to give it to her now. She'd never know exactly how committed to her I was. Primrose snapped me out of my thoughts. "Where are you living now, Dorian?" "Funny you should ask." I grinned. "I actually repurchased the mansion. I just haven't made it a home again yet." Her jaw dropped. "I'm surprised you'd want to do that." "Why?" "There are so many negative memories associated with it." "But more positive ones." Like almost every memory I have with you. Being there makes me feel closer to you when I can't be. "I gave up my dad's company, everything he built. It felt like the right thing to at least get the family home back, so not all was lost." "Okay, that makes sense." Primrose bit her bottom lip. "There's something I want to ask you, but I'm afraid." "Ask me anything, please. It's what I'm here for." "Whatever happened with Candace?" Now, that was a question I was more than happy to answer. My mouth curved into a smile. "You mean, Candace, Chandler, and their two beautiful babies?" "Really?" Primrose covered her mouth. "Oh, thank God." When she lowered her hands, I could see tears in her eyes. She hadn't shed a tear until now, even if at times she'd looked like she was about to cry. "I'd been so worried that things didn't work out. I was always afraid to look her up, not only because I didn't want to inadvertently get information on you, but because I preferred to imagine her happy and healthy." "Well, it seems you manifested that." "She's in remission?" "Yes. She finished all of her treatments and adopted a very Zen lifestyle. She runs a yoga studio now. She and Chandler had frozen her eggs before she started cancer treatments, and they were able to use the embryos and a surrogate to have two kids." "What do they have?" "A girl and a boy. Maya and Mitchell." She beamed. "I'm so happy for them." "Me, too." "Did they know the truth about you all this time?" "I did eventually let them know. They were the only friends besides Benjamin who knew what was going on." "Gosh, I'd love to see Candace." "I'm sure she'd love to see you, too." "Do they know you're here in Ohio?" "Oh, yeah." I laughed. "Why do you say it like that?" "They've been texting me for updates. They're driving me crazy." "That sounds like them." Primrose closed her eyes and leaned back into the sofa. Making myself more comfortable, I used the opportunity to stare at her beautiful features. "What are you thinking about?" She opened her eyes and spoke softly, "I'm thinking that despite the fact that I should be tense around you, I feel pretty at peace right now." "I'm surprised you can feel that way in my presence." "I'm slowly getting used to you again." I grinned, and she returned it. Her smile faded. "Have there been a lot of women in your life in the years you were away?" "Is that what you imagine?" I asked. "That I've been out there all this time fucking away my sorrows?" "I have no idea." "There was only one woman, actually." Her eyes widened. "One?" "Yes. Those first two years, I couldn't fathom being with anyone who wasn't you. And I actually hadn't planned to." "How would that even be possible?" "It was simple. I didn't want anyone else and had it in my head that when I was out of danger, I would come find you and tell you I'd waited for you, even if you hadn't waited for me. I was still committed to you, even though you didn't realize it." She frowned. "What changed?" "I found out you had moved on and had a child. I thought it was over for us. And I met a woman in Greece. Annabella eventually became my girlfriend. She was a really good person, but..." I shook my head. "She wasn't you. I couldn't replicate what I'd felt for you with anyone else." "So you broke her heart like you broke mine?" "It wasn't the same thing, but yeah, I broke up with her before I left." "I'm sorry." She looked down. "My comment was rude. And uncalled for. My emotions are all over the place right now. I'm engaged with a child, and I'm getting jealous over some woman you dated in Greece. It's like I'm one person when I go home and another person altogether when I'm in front of you." My chest filled with hope at the prospect of her jealousy. I warned myself not to get my hopes up, though. "From the get-go, I knew the thing with Annabella wasn't going anywhere. She lived in Greece. All of her family did. She was close to her mother and sisters, and I knew she'd never leave them. It was probably one of the reasons I gravitated to her. Because I knew it would end, and I didn't want a true commitment. I never hid the fact that I planned to go back to the States. I always made that clear." "Did she know why you were in Greece?" "That was the other thing. I was still using an alias. She knew bits and pieces of my actual life, but no, she didn't know everything. Not even my legal name." "That's crazy." She stared into the fire, deep in thought. "Talk to me," I finally said. "I'm sorry. I still don't know what to say. To understand that everything I believed for the past five years was a lie... I just don't think I can process it that quickly." "I don't want to make you sad, nor do I want to make your life difficult. I just needed to get this load off my chest. I couldn't live with it anymore. If somehow getting another chance with you was part of the equation, that would've been a dream. But I also know that this situation is very complicated and that expecting that dream to come true could be a delusion. I'd settle for your forgiveness and your friendship. I don't want to live in a world where you pretend I don't exist because the thought of me causes you pain. I want to see you happy and know that you understand that I love you, not just as your former lover, but as your friend." As I looked at her conflicted face, I made an executive decision that seemed like the right thing to do, even if it killed me. "Originally, I thought I wouldn't leave until you told me to go. But I actually think it might be better if I put some space between us. You shouldn't have to lie about your whereabouts just to appease my need to talk to you. Nor do I want you to feel pressured. So, I think I'll go back to California." Her brows furrowed. "Really?" "Yes. I think that's best. Don't you? I don't want to be some secret that's stressing you out." An alarm went off on her phone. She looked down at it. "Shit. I lost track of time. I have to go." "Go get your daughter," I said, feeling choked up and a bit depressed. "When will you be leaving?" she asked, her voice shaking. "Probably tomorrow." The look of alarm on her face told me she didn't want me to go. But I knew her hands were tied right now. My gut told me to remove myself from the equation to allow her to draw whatever conclusion was best for her. "It won't be the last time you see me unless you want it to be. All you ever have to do is tell me you need me, and I'll be on the next plane back. Primrose, I need you to know I will always be here for you." To my shock, she reached for me, wrapping her arms around my neck and pulling me into a tight embrace. I felt her heart beating against my chest and closed my eyes, relishing the feel of what I knew to be true: Primrose still loved me. Maybe that love was different now, maybe it would have to remain unrequited. But there was solace in knowing it hadn't totally disappeared. I'd take that over nothing. I'd take that over her believing I was the heartless prick she'd lived the past five years thinking I was. But I also wondered if this hug was goodbye. That wrecked me. She pulled back and wiped her eyes. Fuck. I was really messing with her mind. That only validated the fact that I needed to give her space. "You have my number. You know where I live. I'm not going anywhere, Primrose." "Okay," she whispered. A moment later, she disappeared out the door. As she drove away, I tried not to think about the fact that I might never see her again. Instead, I had to believe. When Benjamin walked in a few minutes later, he found me staring blankly into the fire. "What happened, Dorian?" My gaze stayed fixed on the flames. "I decided we should go back to California." "Why?" "It's too much for her. I've said what I needed to. Now I need to give her breathing room. She needs time to digest all this." "When are we leaving?" I finally turned to him. "Tomorrow." "I'm sorry." "For what?" "That this isn't the outcome you were hoping for." "It's not over yet. I feel it in my heart. I just don't know if I'm gonna have to wait three years or thirty. But I'll wait-at least until she tells me it's over and decides to marry him." "Is that being fair to yourself? If she remains unsure, you just stop your life for the next six months or whatever? What does that even look like?" I shrugged. Any life outside of one with Primrose seemed remarkably unimportant right now. "I don't know. I haven't thought that far. But one thing about growing up and maturing is realizing that it's not all about me. Her little girl needs to come first. Whatever Primrose needs to do for her daughter is what she's gonna choose. And I'm okay with that. Because I love her. And I also love her daughter because she's a direct extension of her mother. I need to follow my gut here. And my gut is telling me to physically walk away, even if my heart is still with her." Benjamin placed a hand on my shoulder. "Okay, then. I'll start gathering our things." In a romance-themed observation show, several participants undergo a series of interactions and conflicts filled with love, misunderstandings, and power struggles. In the end, one couple rises to over...